Confessions from the...Vegan?

Dear readers,
     It is with a heavy heart that I write this blog... I have a confession to make. Tonight, I ate a sandwhich with cheese on it. Not just a little cheese, alot of cheese. I didn't order it that way, but, I did eat it that way.
    
    I ordered a Veggie sandwhich. In a momentary lapse of judgement, I forgot that Vegetarian does not, in fact, mean Vegan. When the sandwhich came, I saw that it was loaded with cheese along with the veggies. My hunger spoke louder than my...well...anything else and in about 5 huge bites, it was gone. The sandwhich had dissapeared. After it was over, I had a very full belly and a very uncomforatble nagging in my soul. What had I done? Why had I done that? Why did it taste so delicious? O the deliciousness! The flavor, the meltiness, O man! There are no words. Of course, if I had known I was going to just flat out cheat, I would have done it with big piece of chocolate cake or cheesecake with chocolate sauce or a....... well...... you know where this is going. I would have choosen something besides a little cheese on a sandwhich. Either way, I enjoyed it.
  
     I am sure that I have eaten dairy and meat without knowing it. Butter on popcorn, bacon fat in green beans, I mean, without a personal chef, a million dollars and the resources of  a celebrity, I do feel like I have done the best I can. Tonight, however, it was just a flat out choice and I chose poorly. I am not falling off the Vegan wagon. I committed for one year and I will succeed in this endevour, no matter how difficult it may at times.

     I learned a lesson tonight. Several actually:
One - No matter how strong I think I am, severe hunger will always win out.
Two - Never let myself get to the severe hunger point.
Thirdly - One mistake is not reason enough to fall off the wagon. The wagon is still rolling, I just have to jump back on it. On it, I am.

     It has been about 2 hours since my cheese filled sandwhich disappeared into my stomach and I do feel heavier than I have in last few months. I'm not so sure the cheese is sitting well with me. Wouldn' that be an interesting a lesson learned? After months of not eating it, I am no longer able to... Hummm. I guess we will see.

     Well, thanks for sticking with me, for listening to my confessions and for well, enojoying the food I  long to enjoy. March 28th.... let's get here!